Last night started with me heading down to Brooklyn to hang out with Kyle who is apparently on an extended stay down here for reasons unknown (well, kinda unknown).
The night started out with us getting on the L train in the wrong direction and maybe 5 stops in realizing this. Then the F train wasn't running and we took the E train and walked a few blocks to this place called the Cake Shop. I never been there, but apparently it's got baked goods and records for sale in the front at the bar, there's a back room, and a downstairs with a bar and a stage for bands. Kyle wanted to catch the Mannequin Men cause he heard good things. Apparently he heard wrong, we paid too much for drinks while realizing this and left to head down to Lucy's for some cheap swill and to meet up Jared for a little bit as we set forth a plan for the remainder of the night. This included pbr, gin and shots of jameson.
Standing around outside of Max Fish, some bum approached us offering a magic trick for a dollar. I told him we're broke. Kyle just ignored him. Finally he comes up to us and is like "how about a trick on the house?" I was like "sure." Did the usual "pick a card, any card." of course i noticed he was setting it up so I'd definitely pick the card he wanted me to pick. A trick easy to fool someone piss drunk (or some girl on wine spritzers), but whatever. Iroincally, it was the Joker card. I was tempted to pocket it and run off but wanted to see his stupid trick pan out. that guy was so sloppy, i could catch so many of his not so slight of hand moves. Whatever. He showed me that I picked the Joker card and I walked away. I remeber he tried getting Kyle to pick a card too while Kyle was texting someone but Kyle yelled something at the bum like "I'M WORKING!" I dunno, that made me laugh.
But anyway, Lucy's was the all-star cast of employees. How Lucy isn't dead yet, I don't know. Her daughter and grand-daughter were working there, and so was Marco aka the Denim Reaper. the GILF (granddaughter I'd like to fuck) was being a snobby bitch as usual, but still doesn't mean I wouldn't bang her retarded first chance I will probably never get. Nothing was really going on in Lucy's, Lucy wouldn't turn the volume up on the jukebox for us and there was maybe 1 decent looking girl besides GILF in there. We ended up heading back to Brooklyn to hang out at some bars near where he's staying. First bar was kinda bunk. Highlights included a picture of Morrissy on the mirror behind the bar and the bar tender looking like that dude from Dead or Alive when he had all that wacky long hair. We left there before we even got a drink.
We then went to this other bar, after getting lost for 2 seconds, that my sister showed him on friday when her and her friends showed Kyle around Brooklyn. It wasn't too bad. All I can say for it was good scene, bad services. It took forever to take our orders, but we'd make em like a shot and a beer (or in my case a shot and a gin). To quote Kyle who called me just now "too much Jameson." I saw this girl and was a little flirty with her when ordered a round. She had strawberry blonde hair and a body that looked like it could take a dicking and a half. This went all down hill when I motioned to the loser she was talking to and she brushed me off and ignored me whenever I'd look over at her. Not like I was really putting much effort into it. Just wanted to stroke my ego, I suppose. Highlights at that bar included a girl wearing a chopped up November Coming Fire Samhain t-shirt. She'd be alright if her face didn't look like whatever it did. Then another cute girl dropped her iphone right in front of us and that's the first tiem I can say me, Kyle or this black guy who was asking me something can now say was the first time we've seen an iphone's screen shatter (apparently those phones are durable as hell from what I'm told). But yea, then it took a turn for the strange. Not only did we finally start getting blithering idiot drunk, but in walks a dude looking like, well... the only way I can explain it is "gay irish pirate." He was shirtless wearing this green sparkly sequen shaul over his shoulders, a pirate hat, and white biker shorts. another buddy of his was dressed exactly like how Hunter S Tompson would have dressed (I guess imagine Johnny Depp as him in Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, only not Johnny Depp but some schnook from Brooklyn). Also with these 2 kooks was some dude dressed as a cave man. a text about this resulted in me now having a convo between scott and I on TextsFromLastNight.com: http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/view/45884
but yea, I don't recall much of us going home. All I remember is Kyle walked out the door with a beer and the bouncer was like "go inside and drink that." He finished and we left, staggering down the streets along the highway, back to his place. I now vaguely remember Kyle being so drunk he couldn't get the key anywhere near the keyholes to each door. I took the key from him and did it saying something about being a functional drunk. It turned into a team up where he'd show me what the key looked like on his janitors array of keys and I'd go through each key that looked like said key to try and open a door. The last one to his apartment was a doosie and I remember him being on the floor, face to the door trying to get the key in til we got back.
All else I remember is him pissing, I think he fell in the bathroom, and then going to his room and passing out fully dressed and with the light on. I pissed and passed out on the couch for 2 or so hours before waking up, realize i had to drive to my mom's, get a change of clothes so I could go to work. What ended up happening was I got to my mom's sometime around 8, fell asleep and woke up when I was supposed to have opened the office, got dressed, gave my mom her mother's day present and showed up to work 20 minutes late.
All and all, not bad. Not crazy, but whatever.
Oh, and a funny thing I wanted to post on twitter but couldn't figure out how to send a picture text to my account was that while we were getting off the E train (that sounds like such a drug reference), we saw this pillar in the subway that had scribbled onto it "FOR A GOOD BLOWJOB CALL EMILY AT" and then had some phone number scribbled under it. Very tempted to call, but I'm sure that number must've been changed by now, and if not, I'd be the one call that gets traced to be charged with sexual harassment.
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